Layered Vegetable Salad

Directions, based on the photo:

Stuff, ram, and push as many different raw vegetables

into a big glass bowl as humanly possible. In layers.

Once you’re reached the top, slather mayonnaise on,

the arrange a circle of orange grated cheese on top of that,

then bacon (duh), and in the very middle,

as a sort of focal point, place one, sad stuffed olive.



On no account must this salad be eaten.

If you let every Tom, Dick and Harry dig at it

with their serving spoons, you’d mess up the layers

and the mayo would dribble down and you can bet

some greedy spoilsport would go right for the olive.